So this weekend I attended a parade. Not something I normally do but I went. This parade celebrated Military personnel so there were groups from the Air Force, Navy and Army since they all have bases nearby. The Marines had a small group as well. OK, so we are all cheering, hooting and hollering for the servicemen and women. The group of Vietnam, WWII, Korea, Gulf War vets all get their own trucks and applause.
Then a group marched by and the people were family members of those that died. Each one was holding a placard with a picture, name and dates. It felt like this went on for way too long. Then not one, not two but 3 trucks rolled by with the placards hanging down on the sides. I got choked up at the loss of life and the show of emotion by the crowd. It was something.
Then I get home and catch up on some of the shows I missed. The overall theme I got from a few shows was death. Either of people or of relationships. And I realized that I am the cause of a death. I killed my marriage. And I feel horrible about it. I know there is nothing I can do now but damn, I hate myself for causing this level of pain to my STBE (Soon to be Ex) wife and kids. I disappointed a lot of people including my family.
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